We all know that private schools get your attention through word of mouth and by marketing themselves to attract students. Your first glimpse of most of them may be a glossy pamphlet or catalog which makes the school look like the perfect academic environment. However, marketing materials aren't going to give you the scoop on what it's really like to attend the school: What are the kids like? What sort of culture will you find in the classrooms and dorms? What is the attitude of the faculty?

Dig deeper
This doesn't mean you should toss those school catalogs into the trash — it just means that you'll get to hear and see exactly what the schools want you to. If the school has any less than desirable aspects to it, you won't be seeing those emphasized in any catalog or during your meeting with the admission staff. You might want to know if there are any hazing traditions, problems with bullying, issues with social cliques, or teachers who don't quite cut it.

There's a good chance that none of those issues exist, but you might feel better about your decision if you have a better understanding of the student life and the school culture — things that only insiders really know. A school's culture can be hard to discern, but it guides the everyday behavior of the students and faculty, and ultimately, the overall experience for each student.

So, what's a parent to do? You want to send your child to a private school, but don't know what to expect? Obviously, making a visit and asking pointed questions is your first line of defense, but it probably still won't give you the inside scoop. There isn't any surefire way to do that, but depending on what school you're looking at, there is information out there that may be of use to you. You just have to dig a little deeper.

Get online
There are several parent networks, student associations, forums, chat rooms, and review organizations available on the Internet. Some of them relate to specific schools or certain areas of the country, but they can still offer useful insights into the world of private schools. Most of them offer overwhelmingly positive insight about private schools, even from the students themselves, which is certainly an excellent testimony to the culture and success of private schools.

One of the best ways to find these networks is through the use of search engines such as Google or Yahoo!. Simply type in the name of the school and see what pops up. Some schools' names actually pull up boards dedicated to complaints, but that's not the norm. However, it's worth a try; you may encounter positive reviews instead. That's the great thing about search engines and the Internet — there are thousands of bits of info out there and when you piece them together, you may have enough information to help you feel comfortable with making a final decision.

Get creative
Apart from the name of the school, also try entering phrases such as "private school parent networks" or "private school reviews." There are sites that you may find useful, although they may not have info specific to the school you're considering. Try varying the words you enter, as well as using more than one search engine because doing so will vary the responses that come up. There are too many sites to mention here, but here are two that pop up quite frequently:

• The Berkeley Parents Network at parents.berkeley.edu
• The About Private Schools forum at www.privateschool.about.com/mpboards.htm

Be direct
You may not find exactly what you're looking for on the Internet, but you may find information that can still be useful. When you speak to or visit the schools you are interested in, you should also ask if they have any parent or student references. Many schools will be willing to put you in contact with current or former students and their families. It's pretty much a guarantee that they will have only positive things to say, but you'll at least have the opportunity to ask some specific questions and see what sort of response you get.

It never hurts to ask!